Marriage
is no play. It must be planned. We cannot go through it, and follow the flow.
Especially when the children come. We must also plan for their development.
Their education. Their deen, especially. Often, most fathers, most mothers miss
this. When it comes to education, all they think of was school, textbooks,
Fardu Ain, and such. No! That was not all. Education is not limited to those
mediums. On the other hand, it all begins from the parents themselves. The
father and mother. Their home, for home is where the heart is.
Right
from the very first time they open their eyes, since in time of infancy, babies
learn by imitating their surroundings. Imitating their parents. Their siblings.
How do we expect a child to grow up with parents that are not taking care of
their own prayers? How do we expect a child to grow up in a house full of
worldly entertainments and desires? How do we expect a child to grow up when
they are not even taught to frequent the mosques to get close to Allah? It is
all in the parents. What the parents are made of that make up the environment
that the children will live in. If the parents are far away from Allah, they
will mostly lead the children away as well. Poor children, they will be.
Prophet
Muhammad (peace be upon him) once said in a hadith narrated by Abu Huraira. "A
woman is married for four things, i.e., her wealth, her family status, her
beauty and her religion. So you should marry the religious woman (otherwise)
you will be a loser.” Four things, and Rasulullah p.b.u.h. emphasized on
choosing the religious woman to be married. This might be simple to understand,
but it truly means things much greater than that. A woman is not just a company
to a man named husband. She is also the one who will bear the lives of future
mujahideens for nine months and ten days. She is the one who will feed them
lovingly, the one who will teach them to recite al-Quran, the one who will fill
ad-deen into their hearts, and she is the one who will stay up all those chilly
nights, worrying about her poor sick children. MasyaAllah! So strong a mother
could be. So tough she could live, to help the pure children grow up, the right
way that Allah wants. What if the mother is no pious? What will happen to the
children? There is no need telling. It is obvious.
Be
that as it may, it is not limited to the mother alone. The same goes to the
father. The husband. Won’t a powerless man be embarrassed to dream of marrying
such superwoman? Won’t a guy be embarrassed marrying such wife, if he cannot be
as strong as she is? Won’t a husband be embarrassed not to be able to lead her,
what more the rest of the family towards Jannah? So heavy the burdens of the
parents, yet most of them overlook that. Do they even think of raising another al-Fateh?
Another Imam Shafiee? It is all in the parents. Marriage is no play.
It
gives birth to future ummah.
Farhan Mohd
Kuantan.
